How to Overcome Shyness and Feel Confident in a Crowded Room
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How to Overcome Shyness and Feel Confident in a Crowded Room

Do you feel overwhelmed when someone you don't know well starts talking to you? Do you find it difficult to initiate a conversation? There is no need to lack confidence in a crowded room. It is said that practice makes perfect. Maybe not always, but by practicing a few simple skills at home you can overcome shyness and be more confident in social situations.

Many people avoid social situations because they are shy and lack confidence in a room of people they don’t know. There are times though that you can’t avoid an occasion, even though you may not know any anyone there. There are a few simple things you can do to prepare yourself.

Role play at home: If you know you lack confidence in social situations, don’t wait until you’re invited somewhere. Start practicing now, at home, in front of your mirror. Smile at the image in front of you and watch it smile back. Find the profile of yourself you like best and practice turning it to the mirror. Talk to the mirror image, even if just a few words. When you walk into another room in your home, pretend it is filled with people. Hold your head up and smile, entering the room confidently. Practice makes perfect. If you practice enough at home it will be second nature when you do face up to a social situation.

Practice breathing: Quite often when nervous our breathing becomes rapid. Practice breathing calmly whenever you’re able to do so. If you find yourself breathing rapidly deliberately slow your breathing down. Locate breathing exercises in a book or online that will help you. Again, it’s a matter of practice making perfect. Once developed, the skill of calm breathing will help you in a room filled with people.

Know you look your best: An invitation to a social event doesn’t mean you need to go out and buy new clothes. But, don’t make the mistake of waiting until the last minute to decide what to wear. Decide ahead of time what will be the most appropriate outfit of those you have in your wardrobe. Make sure it is clean and ready to wear. Keep up to date with haircuts, so last minute invitations don’t find you refusing because you’re having a bad hair day.

Have something to talk about: Try and keep up with some aspect of what is happening around you. You may not be interested in world events, but at least know what interesting things are happening in your own community. When you’re alone practice talking about one or two topics by imagining you’re discussing them with someone else. Develop a conversation in your head.

Find someone else on their own: When you arrive, look around for someone else on their own. Approach them with a smile and introduce yourself using all the skills you’ve practiced in the privacy of your home.

Relax, don’t worry: If you do find yourself alone amongst a lot of people, don’t worry. Breathe calmly and stand close to a group of people talking. Often, once someone notices you there, they will widen their circle to include you. Just be part of the group, listening to the conversation. There’s no need to join in until you feel ready.

Remember, practice makes perfect: By practicing these skills at home often you’ll convince your body and brain that there’s nothing to fear. Face up to your next crowded room with confidence. Start accepting invitations. The more you put yourself into a room of unknown people the easier it becomes. Quite possibly many of the people you’ll be with are no more confident than you are. Pretend to be confident. It really does work.

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Comments (2)

very good hon, keep up the good work

Thank you for uplifting my memory and self-esteem Val, best wishes always.